We SHOULD Be Ashamed

Here's an excerpt of an email sent last night by the directors of The Livingston Soccer Club:

"All LSC Parents/Coaches, and Players:

We are now more than halfway through our regular season, with just three more weekends to go. We trust that everyone is having a great time, and we certainly see many happy faces as we visit our fields every weekend.

There is, however, one group of participants that are not having the same level of enjoyment ... and that is our referees.

Since the season began, we have had:

-- A player receive a yellow-card for verbally abusing a referee (an adult referee, no less)

-- A referee witness two (opposing) coaches go nose-to-nose in a screaming match, with another adult stepping in to prevent possible physical involvement

-- Multiple coaches not only (loudly) criticize referees during games, but also continuing the harassment AFTER the game (in at least one case, using profanity)

-- NUMEROUS referees report back that they were subject to snide/sarcastic comments from spectators on the sidelines

-- SEVERAL referees tell us they are no longer interested in being assigned due to the harassment from coaches and spectators

-- A number of referees tell us that they will not officiate games involving certain teams or divisions (again due to the treatment they received during an assignment).

All of us, as a community, should be embarrassed. These referees are:

1. Kids. With just a few exceptions, they are 11-17 years old. Yes, kids.

2. If that isn't enough to make us keep our mouths shut ... they are OUR kids. They are my kids ... they are some of your kids. They are your kids' friends ... they are your friends' kids. Someday they may be your son-in-law or daughter-in-law.

3. These kids are trying their best. Some are officiating for the first time ... others have been doing it for several years and have gone through more rigorous training to become licensed.

4. The experience of being a referee can be tremendously rewarding for these kids. For many (most), this their first real "job". They are learning responsibility in terms of communicating with their "bosses", as well as taking charge of other kids (and adults) on the field. It is a great opportunity for them to learn important life skills.

5. Having said that, a "life skill" that they do NOT need to learn yet is that people can be rude, obnoxious, immature, and even cruel. They have plenty of time to learn that and we (the LSC Board) will do whatever is necessary to shield them from that. Hopefully, they will also learn that their "boss" has their back and will look out for them.

We want to emphasize that ALL of us share in this shame."

Kudos to the directors for having the courage to stand up for the KID referees! I AM ashamed. Parents behaving badly in front of parents is one thing. But in front of the kids? Deplorable!

How can we assure our children that they live in a safe community when we can't guarantee them of that safety when take a leadership role in the community?

We, as parents, need to grow up.